Leaders repeatedly ask me: “Why do people act/behave as they do?” (The question is typically asked in the context of problematic and counter-productive actions.) But I would expand the question to, “Why do I act/behave as I do, for good or ill? What drives effective, productive actions? What drives ineffective, counter-productive actions?”

Let us begin our discussion at the point of observation. As leaders, we observe, over a period of time, individual actions and performance and form general characterizations about each individual. We label these as their personality or reputation that, in turn, becomes an expected behavior. This personality or reputation is a pattern of unique behaviors and characteristics that is consistently displayed. This reputation takes on a “persona” as the “external visible self” which we title, “personality.” There is no discernable difference between one’s reputation and personality. People are outgoing or aloof, controlling or cool, calm and collected, high strung, confident, mean spirited, negative, workaholics, considerate, unproductive…etc.

If we drill down below the surface of the immediate behavior, we observe that people make choices that produce behaviors. People choose to be engaging, which appears to be outgoing. People chose to take charge, which appears to be controlling. People chose to worry, which appears as anxiety.

At this point, I sense objections. Some say, “I do not choose these behaviors. They occur without a thought. I just do it.”

I agree. Many of our actions are routine habits that seem natural and automatic. But, there was a time and place where the pattern was established based on conscious or subconscious thoughts and choices.

If we drill down even further the next questions is, “What drives my choices?”

The answer: My thinking drives my choices that drive my behavior that builds my reputation/personality. I think in terms of meeting and being with people. I make a choice of engagement and demonstrate a pattern of being warm and outgoing. The reputation I establish is one of being an extravert. Or, conversely, I think that meeting people is stressful and awkward and I choose to be private and stay to myself. The behavior demonstrates aloofness and I build a reputation of being introverted – all based on my thoughts that work themselves out into actions. “The ancestor of every action is a thought.”

Thinking

I use the word “thinking“ as an umbrella term to describe all the cognitive processing in my conscious and subconscious thoughts. My thinking includes my assumptions, attitudes, values, beliefs, convictions, prejudices, biases; basically my conclusion about myself, my work, others and all of life. Then I use these thoughts/conclusions to filter all I take in through my perceptive senses. I use them for recognition, interpretation and expectation; meaning, my thinking not only sets in motion my behaviors but also becomes the key to understanding.

Perceive-Think-Choose-Act

I use a simple process diagram to illustrate the concept: Perceive >Think> Choose>Act.

We perceive the world around us through our “six” senses (sensory skills include intuition/emotional intelligence) that constantly pick up stimulus hardwired directly to our brain where we “think” about what we have perceived. That perception is evaluated using our filters of recognition, interpretation and expectation, leading us to our thoughts about what we perceived. We then make choices based on that thinking, and act.

Over the next series of posts, I will explore examples of thinking using this model.

The Lyrics: “Communication breakdown, it’s always the same, I’m having a nervous breakdown, drives me insane!” As a college student, I actually listened to and enjoyed the music; and, as an activist, was critical of “The Man’s” failure to communicate. Today, my taste in music has changed and now in the position of being “The Man,” I find communication breakdowns annoying.  Communication breakdowns continue today as a leader’s nemesis. Today, amid the proliferation of communication devices, portals and digital systems, communication breakdowns not only persist, they thrive and flourish.

We ask leaders, “What is the single, most critical, problematic, leadership issue you are currently facing?”

“Communication” appears on 97% of the lists. In fact, communication breakdown is the single, most common response.

The most common root causes of communication breakdowns are:

•Failure to appreciate one’s responsibility to communicate
•Making false assumptions about what others already know and understand
•Failure of the communicator to have a clear understanding of what is being communicated
•Habits of speaking in jargon, popular metaphors and “pc” slogans
•Insecure feelings that cause one to hide his/her lack of understanding
•Rushed, harried panic believing that one does not have time for communication
•Impatience with the discipline and details communication requires
•Failure to appreciate an individual’s contribution to the whole
•Big picture oriented, thus missing the detailed components
•Low “EQ” (emotional intelligence) causing one to miss subtleties in communication

What Are The Keys To Effective Communication?
Effective communication begins with a mental picture of the expected outcomes. A leader cannot communicate what he/she does not conceptually comprehend. To communicate, the leader must be willing and able to:

•Conceptually understand and clearly communicate expectations (i.e., visualize and verbalize  expectations).
•Accurately depict strategies and plans to meet expectations (i.e., describe a general sense of direction, functional detail and required resources).
•Enable and facilitate people to accomplish realistic goals (i.e., goals need to be “positive, rational, optimistic,” as well as specific, worthwhile, and measurable).
•Encourage performance to exceed expectations (i.e., value both internal and external customer needs, encourage continuous improvement and communicate with stakeholders).

Five Communication Talking Points for Leaders:
There are five simple points that, if articulated and answered as questions by leaders, will improve communication. These are:
1  Vision: Where are we going? (The 50,000-foot view. Paint a verbal picture of the end result describing what the completed task will look like when it is finished.)
2. Expectation: How do we expect to get there? (The focused ground level perspective. What needs to be done to accomplish the goal and how will the element be fit together?)
3. Value: Why are we doing this? (Why is this important, what is the reason and purpose driving this goal?)
4. Contribution: Where do “we” (you and I) fit in? (Identify and communicate the valuable contributions of each person involved, letting them know why and how they are important to the success and how they make an important difference.)
5. Timing: When will we get there? (Laser sharp priorities, deadlines, target dates and time lines.)

Busy leaders often underestimate the task of clearly communicating expectations. The fact is, communication is one of the most powerful and important tasks of a leader’s responsibility. An effective communicator is parallel to an effective leader.
Leaders often ask: “How often must I communicate these things?”
The answer: “As often as the questions are asked.”
You know you have communicated accurately and effectively when you hear those you lead communicating to others the vision, expectation, value, contribution and timing.
Once people understand these key points, the vast majority will respond with appreciation and motivation to meet expectations. Since most people want to be effective and be part of a success, the information communicated in answering these questions provides the resources for empowering their success and, consequently, the leader’s and the organization’s.

As I face difficult communication situations and breakdowns as a leader, I accept and believe “I am 100% responsible for my communication.”